After I left the hospital I was relived, and also more stressed than I was before. I was on bed rest for the remainder of the week and weekend.
I had a follow up appointment the next day where we could see our little baby again. This time Tori was able to come with me.
I went home and slept a lot the rest of the week. I think part of me was tired and another part of me just needed to turn my brain off. I was terrified that every sneeze would vacate the baby!
A week later I had my first appointment with my midwives. Everything went well, and the baby was doing great again. They did want to take another look just to make sure. They said they could see a small bleed in my uterus, which could be the cause of my spotting – if I were to start gushing blood again go straight to the hospital.
As time went on I still was having a hard time emotionally getting attached to my pregnancy. I was so terrified I would loose the baby.
Christmas approached and in effort to connect with the baby and celebrate with all of our family we decided to share the good news!
“Every baby deserves to be celebrated,” someone told me, and you know what? It stuck. Even if I did loose this baby I wanted the world to help me celebrate it!
Everyone was thrilled for us!
Fast Forward a few more weeks and it brings us to another scare. Another bleed.
But – this baby is determined to come into this world.
I love the bottom one – the baby is sleeping on its belly just like me. This is how the baby was when we first peeked in. The ultrasound tech had to bump the baby a little to get it to flip over so we could see the heartbeat a bit better 🙂
Tori thinks the little one gave us a thumbs up!
It was so amazing getting to see the baby that day. Watching it squirm and move made it so much more real.
I’m still struggling to take down that wall though.
I know it will happen, maybe not as quickly as I would like, but I’m hoping with the first big kicks and the first hiccups I will get a lot closer to taking this wall down…but for now we are just trying to treat every day like the miracle it is.
So that’s it! We are up to date! We are all caught up… this is the end of the fertility series. I will begin a new series – a pregnancy series that talks more about day to day stuff with updates about our crazy little growing family! Thank you all so so much for the amazing feedback from this series! I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about this next one!