And We’re off to Maui! (United Airlines) Day 1

So after we tied the knot we were on fire! We were also tired AF buuuuut still on fire so we barley slept. When we finally did fall asleep we woke up super early because …. We were still on fire. We packed all day and headed up to our hotel in Boston for the night. Neither of  us were excited about leaving our fur babies behind…. I nearly had a meltdown moments before leaving…. actually, part of me wanted to cancel the trip JUST so we could stay home with them! SHEESH! Not to mention Tori and I both had a funny feeling about our Honeymoon in Maui. We both honestly thought about postponing the trip. However, we did leave and once we got to the hotel and received our room key I noticed the keys had a photo of a Golden with shades on. That eased my anxieties a little.

The next morning we woke up bright and early to make it to the airport for 4am. We checked in and went through TSA with no troubles. We walked over to our gate and noticed we had about an hour before the plane departed so we went for breakfast. We took our time eating and daydreamed about Maui. At this point we were beginning to become excited… that was until the lady at Pete’s coffee stuffed up my morning coffee… I should have known it would be all downhill from there :/

As we finished breakfast Tori insisted on grabbing me another cup of coffee so we could start the trip off right. I walked to our gate as she went back to Pete’s coffee. When I got to the gate I realized they were doing last call for boarding!!! I rushed and called Tori,”Forget the coffee and just come to the gate! They are done boarding!” Neither of us realized that flights board the plane about 30 minutes before take off! Whoops.

When I went to check us in, a United manager came over to me and told me we would have to check our carry on bags (now keep in mind its 5am , and I hadn’t had a good nights sleep for 4 nights!  I WAS SO CONFUSED ). I told the United manager that I couldn’t check my carry on, the stuff in the bag was essential to have on the plane with me. I mean come on, the extra 5 pairs of underwear, what if I peed my pants from laughter… 5 times?!? This guy didn’t think I was funny and started waving his hands in my face yelling, “WELL I GUESS WE WILL HAVE TO FIND YOU A DIFFERENT FLIGHT THEN WONT WE?!” After he started yelling I tuned out and started crying. Thats when Tori came over and asked what was going on. We both unpacked our carry on bags and stuffed as much as we could into our backpacks.

Once we loaded the plane we realized we were not seated next to each other. So I again started crying. Tori voiced up though, she asked one of the men that was separating us if he would mind switching with us, and he did. He was so so nice! The rest of that flight was fine, and when we landed we realized we had to rush to our next gate in San Fransisco. We didn’t make the time to thank the man who had switched seats with us again, I’m convinced that is why our trip went to poorly from here on out.

We rushed around trying to get food before we boarded out next flight, this time we learned our lesson and made sure were we the first in line to board. Once we got on the plane we realized that another couple had been split up and the wife was obviously upset. Tori and I suggested that she switched seats with the woman in the back window seat so she could be next to her honey. They moved seats and we got our new flight buddy… Lets call her Sarah. Well Sarah stood up and we realized she would take up a lot more room than just here seat, so she came up and squeezed in. She was friendly and incredibly soft spoken.

About 45 minutes into the flight she grabbed a bag in Tori’s seat pocket and asked if it was a SICK BAG… At this point I am ready to GET THE FUGE OUT! GET OFF THE PLANE! EVERYONE EVACUATE! I CAN NOT BE NEAR THIS WOMAN WHILE SHE TRIES TO THROW UP IN A SICK BAG! IS IT THE STOMACH BUG OR IS SHE JUST MOTION SICK?! Um… I just don’t handle vomit well. The bag wasn’t a sick bag… there wasn’t one in her seat, there wasn’t one in Tori’s seat, and there wasn’t one in my seat…. she she threw up all over herself, the window, the tv, the chair, Tori’s leg, and the floor….and I of course wasn’t wearing shoes.

We stood in the middle of the aisle for about an hour while the United crew attempted to clean up the vomit. They did a terrible job. There was vomit all over the floor, all over the seats, and all over the screen still. They laid garbage bags over our seats so it wouldn’t soak into our clothing. The smell was horrendous and guess what… WE DIDN”T HAVE A CHANGE OF CLOTHES BECAUSE THEY MADE US CHECK OUR FUDGING CARRY ONS!!!!! Oh and Sarah kept getting up to go throw up. When she would come back to her seat she would grab the Victoria’s Secret body spray and spritz in between her legs…. Like that will make it better. ugh I want to throw up now thinking about it!

Tori ended up getting so nauseous that they moved her to the front of economy plus so she could be away from the smell. They sat her next to a woman with a Dog… meanwhile I am stuck in the back of the plane… in a vomit chair…. trying to “get used to the smell,” FOR 2 and a half HOURS! When we FINALLY landed we rushed off that plane faster than you can believe!


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